Hmm. This looks familiar.
January 6th, 2009 by Dusty
You know how I enjoy writing stuff to make people laugh? And I do it essentially for free because I love it and I like the fact that others like it? Well…here’s the thing. Anyone who has ever created anything of their own knows that your creations are your own, and you have a kind of motherly protective instinct about it. I have never minded having a half zillion people forward my stuff around, use my sayings and invented words on tee shirts, borrow my writing for use in articles or in books, and so on. I’m going out on a limb and saying I’m pretty cool about that kind of thing. And now that I think of it, I’m probably the world’s shittiest businessman.
I also understand the concept of parallel thought (which could be better termed “converging thought”, if you think about it). If one guy has an observation that is clever and funny, chances are, given enough time someone else will have the same observation. I have often found mine to be similar to someone else’s, but I try to be careful to give credit. There are a few reasons for this – First, copying takes all of the fun out of being creative…or maybe is the opposite of creativity. Second, I am so narcissistic that I cannot comprehend anyone else’s missives or observations being nearly good enough to call my own (that part is really sort of bullshit – the truth is that if I ever wrote anything truly profound, no one would believe it was mine). And finally and most importantly, I think it takes a kind of sociopath to do something like that.
So the other day I got an email that said “Hey, my favorite entry of yours was the one where you were in the airport and there was a guy talking too loudly on his phone and you shamed the hell out of him. That was great. Where can I find it? I was also looking for the one where you went to a liquor store and got yelled at for saying ‘urban’. Where is that?”
So I did what I usually do – I remembered a word or phrase I had used in that entry and Googled it. Imagine my surprise when I found TWO stunning examples of not only parallel thought, but parallel dialogue, reaction, and experience.
The time I was stuck in the Detroit airport and shamed a guy for being a douche can be read in its originality —>here.<---
And amazingly, I found this blog<---(That's a link, by the way. Wordpress sucks and will not underline), where a guy whose keyboard name is Captain Jack had the EXACT SAME EXPERIENCE, except it was at the baggage claim at Dulles -
When I was at Dulles airport the day after Thanksgiving, waiting for my kids to get back from Disney, I was sitting by where all the passengers exit to go to baggage claim, and this guy was pacing around with his stupid bluetooth thing, yelling a conversation with somebody.
“WELL, ERIC, WE CANT…NO. I SPECIFIED THE 5904 PRODUCT AND THEY TOOK DELIVERY OF THE 6302. WHAT I THINK SHOULD HAPPEN IS WE SHOULD CALL THE TRANSPORT COMPANY AND – WAIT, DID YOU TALK TO SUZANNE TODAY? BECAUSE SHE SAID SHE WENT OVER THE FLOW WITH THE PROJECT MANAGER AND…”
You get the point. Word for word my writing, but the location had been changed to protect the stupid. Ironically, the entry ended like this -
I’m telling you, public shaming is the way to a better society. I know it hurts people’s little precious fragile feelings, and that’s practically against the law in the Pussozoic era in which we presently live, but it is devastatingly effective.
Well, let’s put that to the test, shall we? I mean, you said it, right Dean?
I began browsing through his blog and found that all but one of his entries were mine, but he had not-so-cleverly re-worded them to fit his life. Or lack thereof. Here’s another great example –
“Speaking of which, last week’s monsoon knocked a bunch of trees into power lines, cars, and garages all over my neighborhood.
Goddamn trees.
That brought me to a final decision about what kind of car I am getting next. I had my mind set on a Honda Accord, but that was before the stupid trees started ruining refrigerated goods and therefore lives. At that point I considered a Hummer or a steam locomotive, whichever creates more pollution.
Then I saw the Timberjack 1470D Harvester on Discovery channel. The “D” stands for “Dean must have this for his birthday (September 25)”. Oh my dear sweet lord, Timberjack has harvested my heart.”
Really Dean? REALLY? I’m pretty sure the D stands for “Don’t steal my goddamned work and change my name to yours.” And my birthday is October 11, jackwipe. The original article was published in Atlanta Illustrated and I can’t find it since we put up a new site, but some of you may remember reading it.
There was also —>this guy<--- named Cody Jones, from Memphis Tennessee - he has amazingly also had identical life experiences over the past few years. Same situations, same dialogue, same everything. In fact, his first entry "Who's yer Mayor" is the (my) title that his whole lie of a blog is based on, and came word for word from an entry I wrote in Atlanta Illustrated and was later published in Link Magazine.
Also, Check out this exchange that took place at a liquor store -
“Why he gotta’ be UURRBAN?”
*several seconds go by as I try to figure out what in the hell she is talking about*
“Buh…muh…b’cuz we are in an urban ar…”
“CAUSE HE’S BLACK?!”
I actually buried my face in my hands at this point. I decided to have tiny dictionaries printed up that I can hand out like some people do with bibles.
“No. Urban does not mean black. We are in an urban area. The city. Memphis. Nevermind.”
Memphis, Cody? MEMPHIS? God how I’d love to knock your teeth down that jizzflume you call a throat. It happened in Atlanta. At Green’s on Ponce. To me. Not in Memphis to you, or in Virginia to Dean (he copied the same entry). That is why I wrote about it. That is one of what I am sure are myriad reasons you suck.
The more I read, the pisseder I got. I’m weirdly flattered in the way a molestation victim is probably flattered that you picked him over all of the other children, but not enough to get past the glaring dishonesty of it all. Cody even wrote a —>heartwarming story<--- about how he proposed to his girlfriend in a manner markedly like what he read in my blog. Fine with me if you want to propose however you want to, but ripping off my words to describe it makes the whole story as much of a sham as your marriage will be.
So, here's the rundown - Dean's blog has 36 entries, 35 of which were written by me and painstakingly adjusted to change my name to his in an effort to make him seem funny to his friends on World of Warcraft and his Star Wars Action figures who no doubt idolize him from their lofty perch above the computer in his mom's basement. The remaining entry was written by a guest writer who somehow got credit for his or her own work.
Cody has 26 total entries and 24 of them were written by me, which makes him the winner of a contest akin to "the most sincere child molester". Also, Cody mentions a friend named Dean in an entry or two, so maybe there is something else afoot or maybe I'm just losing my mind. In any case, I read through almost all of them (the spider one, “Insectification of my state of mind”, and several of the other crowd favorites – hey, at least they knew which ones were good) and I could never have anticipated my reaction. I’ve been ripped off before, but in the past it was verbatim and the “writer” gave me credit when I asked them to and nothing more was said about it. This is different, and I thought about what to do.
My options were sort of as follows – 1. An elaborate scheme to bait them in to copying more of my stuff that had hidden messages in it about them (too much work), 2. posing as a publisher offering a book deal only to crush their dreams (possibly bad karmic repercussions), 3. writing a “hey seriously…not cool…cut it out” email or two (way too easy on them), or 4. outing them as the liars they are to people they know in hopes that they will stop it and hopefully not raise children who also suck (perfectly feasible). I had to consider that these were not high school kids trying to look cool. They are both in their late 30’s and should know better.
After thinking about it over a couple of days of fly fishing, I came to this conclusion – I am tired of letting stupid people get away with doing stupid things because they “are just that way” or whatever reason people give for letting retards be retards. I have written about public shaming as a surefire way to keep idiots from repeating idiotic behavior. In fact, the first entry I came across in Dean’s (my) blog was that very entry, and his readers squealed with delight at his clever wording and insightful…uh…insight. So I might as well make them eat my words…or something. As much as I hate to send traffic to their sites, I’m going to ask a favor of all of you.
If you’ve been reading my writing for any length of time and enjoying it, I need your help to get these two losers shamed in front of their friends, family and internet followers. I don’t expect anyone to put much time into it, but if you want to just shoot them a comment, please feel free. The most important thing to me is that their friends know that their ‘awesome insights’ and ‘clever observations’ are not theirs. After I publish this entry, I will be sending their friends and family a link to my blog so they will know that Dean and Cody have precious few original thoughts worth sharing. Their friends will probably get mad at me for making a big deal out of it and act like I am the bad guy and be all ‘you really didn’t need to embarrass him. He just really liked your writing and blah blah blah moronic flailing I’m not making a point…’ To which I say this:
We are all grown ups making day-to-day grown up decisions. Part of having the responsibility of making those decisions is the responsibility that comes with the consequences of those decisions. If these guys or their friends or family are wise enough to do so, they will realize that this shaming is for Cody and Dean’s own good. As for me, I realize that my responsibility for having chosen this course of action as a response to them is the possibility or guarantee that I will get lots of angry emails from their friends and probably some of my readers…as well as the possibility that one or both of them may choose to challenge me to fisticuffs, or even worse, come back all apologizey and make me feel bad. I assure you that the emails will be read and considered. And by “read and considered”, I mean “deleted”. Some things are black and white and actually do have a correct answer. This is one of those things.
So although I’m sure their blogs will be vaporized milliseconds after this goes live, I found both of these guys on Facebook, and could send a message to each of their friends, as could you. I also copied the entire contents of their sites and will be posting it all safe from all deletery (see, it’s not illegal if it’s my content to begin with. What a wonderful world). I’ll post the link when it’s finished.
–UPDATE– Dean wrote me an email and apologized, so I agreed to remove his name and email address. I know, I’m not nearly the hardass I’d like to be either. Apologies are like kryptonite to me.
I’ve already shamed Star Trek, on my way to Dean’s as we speak. Well not speak in the literal sense….you know what I mean.
I too have left a word of wisdom for Mr Star Trek and am only awaiting my registration approval to grace Mr Cody with a thought or two about plagiarism, such as “don’t mess with my favorite blogger.”
By the way, hope you had a great holidays and that your long silence means you and Sarah had a fabulous wedding and honeymoon. I can’t wait to see those two losers sorted out so we can read about all the craziness that must surely have happened in your celebration. We all know Shenannigans is your middle name.
Actually, Shenannigans is my middle name, but Dusty ripped it off.
Let’s get ‘em!
Dusty — Plagiarism sucks. I’ve had a lot of my amazon.com reviews “borrowed” for reviews on other sites. I see that and thing, Why you lazy S.O.B… I called one of them on it, who in turn accused me of copying them. Thankfully, Amazon uses a rudimentary date stamp that helped me prove otherwise.
Shaming and embarrassment are pretty good tonics for this form of identity theft.
Your blog posts make my day — thanks for all the work you put into it!
Jim
I’ve personally felt the frustration of trying in vain to get friends to help post supremely negative reviews of restaurants where we’ve had horrible experiences, only to find no one willing to join in in my attempts to destroy the hopes and dreams of a restaurateur who made the unforgivable mistake of hiring a bad waiter.
In other words, I’m in.
That is lame. Like making up quotes from fictional people in a High School Year Book, to look popular. How fucking lazy.
BTW…I verbally use your phrase, “sweet baby Jesus in a carry on bag” and “sweater clowns” every so often. But I tell people where I got it.
Phil
Jax, FL
I hate copy-cats!
In fairness, I do think I heard “sweater clowns” somewhere before I used it. However, I do think there is a distinction between using a clever term and stealing an entire story. Or if I had said “hey I made up the term “Sweater Clowns” because I am a complete genius.”
Anyway, stay cool and have a great summer. You’re my best friend.
-Colt McStudley, QB of our football squad.
Ok, Dusty. I typed and deleted in the comment section on his Star Trek nerdy site for at least 30 minutes. I tried to be clever, but at 6:20am, I stink. You probably smell like kittens and rainbows at that hour. Sweater clowns are another matter entirely.
I use “squat blossom” as often as I can in conversation, happily giving credit to your grandmother via your writing.
Thanks for calling a spade a spade. Now let’s help these spades dig a hole!
Outted Dean for the dick hole he is. Awaiting confirmation from Cody to post.
Never heard of them….when fans go too far, eh?
Ummm….imitation is the sincerest form of flattery?
??
Nah just kidding. What douches. Also, kind of sad.
Ok, Dusty. I typed and deleted in the comment section on his Star Trek nerdy site for at least 30 minutes. I tried to be clever, but at 6:20am, I stink. You probably smell like kittens and rainbows at that hour. Sweater clowns are another matter entirely.
…
I mean… uh…
I shamed him too.
(Just playin’, Teri…)
I can’t be bothered to register on those places to repeat what your rabid fans have already said. So in lieu of any serious trash talking comments, I leave you with this.
what has 2 legs and bleeds a lot?
1/2 a Cat
Well, it looks like it took Captain Jack about 2 hours and some change to take the page down. I’ll post a link to his stuff when I get it up on a new site. Thanks for the support, folks.
That is the most outrageous bunch of copyright infringement I’ve seen since Obama’s acceptance speech!
If you need a space for your new site, just holler.
You know what you really should do instead of deleting those emails? Post them here for us to giggle at.
Well, someone did start a plagiarism thread on the star trek discussion board, but the blog has been removed. Cody’s is still up, though.
Actually, I don’t think that the plagiarism thread is up anymore. They’ve gone about the typical daily DC routine of ignoring it like it never happened.
You did the right thing here Dusty.
Keep up the good work.
Wow, unreal. I looked at some of Cody’s stuff and at least he took the time to copy your entry re: The Xcelrator, and take pictures of himself to replace your pictures. I guess it’s only a matter of time that he also copies your entry on the 10 worst album covers ever.
I wouldn’t be surprised if there are other douchebags out there doing the same thing. You just haven’t found them yet.
Looks like the little snot took down the post. The link to it no longer works. Great job everyone
I should say, the Star Trek nerd took his down. Cody’s is still there.
What happened to your post after the election? The one about “hope cometh…”
I personally always go back to the Quesy stories when Ive had a bad day and need a laugh. No matter how many times I read them, I cry laughing and for someone to try to copy those moments is shameful. You’ve done the right thing Dusty.
happy to help.
OK, now I’m really pissed. I just found his copy of the “spider in the shower” entry. Now Cody is no my list . . ..
Dusty, it’s not nice to pick on guys who have never, and will never, have sex… Bwahahaha!
Dusty, I’ve been an avid reader for a few years. Imagine if the plagiarizers had the capability of blocking you from your own blog, then after copying your blog to their site, they ERASED YOUR BLOG?
That’s basically what happened to me on Wikipedia. An administrator who is an A-Number-1 prick took a disliking to me, so he plagiarized my work, erased my original, blocked my account on Wikipedia, then went about the Internet proudly proclaiming that he had written the material “ab initio”. Funny thing is, he is the exact same administrator who doctored up the Wikipedia article about Rachel Marsden, mere hours before Wikipedia co-founder went to a Washington DC Doubletree to get it on with Marsden. (All true, don’t worry — documented in the press, so it’s not libel.)
If you or your readers would like more detail about my story, here is a link:
http://tinyurl.com/WikiPlagiarism
That really sucks, Dusty. Though, I know I can name the two least creative suckholes in this country.
Much love,
z
I’d find it extremely amusing if Cody was copying Dean and knew nothing about you. Why do stupid people keep breeding?
What a bunch of f***tards! I’ve been an avid reader of your greatness here for the last few years and this pisses me off! Let’s shame these two to the fullest extent!
SHEER BRILLIANCE! Way to stick it to the nerdy plagiarists!
Did you know you can send a letter to their hosting provider regarding this and probably get their account suspended? That’s the standard response for this sort of thing.
How to make a DMCA Complaint: http://webdesign.about.com/od/copyright/ss/fight_theft_5.htm
Also, if you want to track other people doing this, just set up a Google alerts for uncommon phrases in one of your most favored entries.
If you need my help, you have my sword.
The funniest part is that they – in their attempts to make the entries their own, dawg – seem to be taking the funny out of most of the plagiarised posts (this was true of that good ol’ boy, Cody, anyway) with the addition of poor spelling and questionable grammar. (And when I say “funny,” I don’t mean it was…well, funny. I could go back and change “funny” to “ironic” now, but then I’d have a whole lot less to talk about and what fun would that be?)
I’ll bet Cody isn’t even as old as he claims. I’m guessing he’s somewhere between 16 and 22 and steals every word he posts anywhere online from other writers. He wants to be Dusty – all he needs now is his “Dusty skinsuit,” so be careful, D-man. Don’t open the door for strangers and don’t stop your car in the road to help that guy who appears to be bleeding by the side of the road. It’s all a ruse!
Copy your experience? Damn, I thought you went through this shit so the rest of us wouldn’t need to…
Vengeance is sweet.. – j
I was also going to suggest a DCMA complaint…
It looks like both sites are down now. What I would like to see now are apologies.
Dean came clean. Whatever delusions he may have suffered from have dissolved, and he said he was sorry and he deserved it. Haven’t heard from Cody, and I sort of doubt that I will. But he rides a Harley, so he’s probably rambling somewhere.
Jerks!
Shameful and this Cody character has made it necessary to have an account to read plagiarism. I will not give him 1 more membership to continue.
Both sets of posts are toast. Their hosts have been notified and it appears the long arm of the law has taken swift action (to cover their own corporate butts, of course).
This is what I get for tuning in at 4 p.m-ish – both sites are down and gone already. Asshats.
You did the right thing Dusty – and I’m glad we were able to help. I like the idea of setting up Google alerts for some of your more notable phrases, that way we can be on top of the next situation as soon as it becomes necessary (although I certainly hope it doesn’t).
Your blog is my favorite thing to read on the web, you’ve made me laugh and you’ve made me cry and there’s a special place in hell for those who elicit real emotions under false pretenses.
Keep up the good work!
Since you’re obviously too nice a guy *coughpansyassicallyouthatbecauseiloveyoucough* to play a little rough with these fuckwits, allow me to share with your readers some of what you and I previously discussed, if I may be so bold.
Hola Fellow Readers of D-Bag, Holder of Original Phrases and Small Junk!
For some light reading, you can check out all of the entries Google wrongly deemed worthy of indexing here:http://www.google.com.au/search?hl=en&q=site%3Acodyfermayor.com&btnG=Google+Search&meta=
and here:http://www.google.com.au/search?hl=en&q=site%3Awww.startrekreborn.net&btnG=Google+Search&meta=
There are ways to find out actual names of the people who own these sites too, most of them legal. Google “Who Is” and it’ll tell you about how to find out the real name and email of whomever has registered the domains startrekreborn.net and codyfermayor.com. Though these may not be the culprits, you can then either Google these names, or email them directly and ask for the names of the fellas who own these sites.
Then, you can find them on Facebook…
and let the shaming begin.
P.S. Yo D, If you’re not smert enough to have changed the password on your account for this site, I can log in and make your links have underlines and stop you from sissybitching, sissybitch. Otherwise, change your password, that’s just too much power for someone like me.
Do it, CSSHole!
Son,
You make me proud. Very good analyzing, planning, and execution.
Damn. I have you as the premiere slot on my “Blogs” RSS page, and I get to reading it after a long, hard day at work, and I’ve missed all of the schadenfreude action.
Dusty, looks like I missed the fireworks man. Sucks, cause I woulda been all over them like herpes on Paris Hilton. Too bad that you didn’t pursue legal action against them. Might have made a pretty penny out of the settlement. Plus, they could have been put in jail for plagiarizing you.
I dunno man. To me, there’s more than one way to skin a ‘tard. Your way’s just as good as mine I suppose.
Trent
Such a shame I missed out on all the fun. Its a shame your work was passed off as original by these oxygen thieves.
I can’t believe I missed all the fun… but glad it got somewhat “resolved”.
Wow. …They would’ve gotten away with it, too, if it weren’t for a meddling Googler/author. I think you did the right thing to shame them both to a nub. Idjits.
Dear Dusty,
I feel your pain. I’ve been reading your stuff for a few years, and I love your sense of humor. I’ve seen you through the loss of your cat, several family reunions, and I even watched the video where you learned to fly. In a plane. You probably don’t recall, but I even interviewed you for the quasi-extinct publication Tastes Like Chicken a few years back. Good times, good times.
Please keep writing. Justice will be served! God hates liars, and no one’s died from anal leprosy in quite sometime. You do the math.
Thomas
Dusty, I admire original work, and the amount of effort that goes into creating it. I also understand how upsetting it is to have your work ripped off. Good for you for exposing this.
I’m sure that these guys just don’t understand how it feels to have your creative ‘babies’ stolen – and I’m sure they’ve learned a valuable lesson about how there is also no anonymity in a digital age, and this sort of thing is quickly discovered.
I’ve enjoyed your site for a number of years and hope you keep up the great work!
jizzflume…. priceless!
Well, both of them have apologized to me in what I believe to be an honest way. They both feel like shit and I’m pretty sure neither of them will do it again. That’s really all that could come of it. As for the suing/legal action thing – well, if they had enough money for me to retire on, they could have hired someone better than I to write for them in the first place.
Plus, I think there’s too much lawyering going on and not enough fist fights these days. Fist fights (or any other kind of public display of right and wrong) solve shit in a much more decisive, efficient way. As long as you stop before someone pulls out a knife, I guess.
But I do thank all of you from the bottom of my panties for standing up for/with me. I wasn’t expecting quite such a response, but it means a lot.
Did either asshat give any kind of reason for so blatantly ripping off your blog? I would really really *really* like to know exactly why either of them thought that was an OK thing to do.
Why would people do that?
I second Countessa’s question Dusty. These turds need to explain themselves.
Trent
An apology to you is awesome.
I say that the atonement is not complete until they apologize on their websites where said damage occurred.
Then, and only then, the healing may begin.
That is my two cents.
On the other hand, it seems like Codys foray into politics (Codyfermayor) is moving along swimmingly.
He already has his first scandal and public lawbreaking experience out of the way, now he can move on to bigger things like intern oral and buying votes and plotting the demise of his constituents and bringing a city to its knees and…..SORRY…I have to adjust my tinfoil hat now………….
Well, there’s not much left to say regarding plagiarism without, well…plagiarizing your other, less awesome readers so: God Bless, Dusty…we all know where the fountain of funny originates. Happy New Year to you and Sara, and thanks for the new missive.
OH! and try ” Jesus Jumped-Up Christ in a chariot driven sidecar!”*
* thanks, Stephen King
Hey Dusty,
Sorry to hear about this crap. It’s a real pain in the arse but for the gold nugget blog posts you could write the whole thing in your word processor of choice. Then you could simply do screen prints and save them as Gifs. Then post the Gifs. That would at least thwart the waste of flesh copy and paste goblins. Cheers my friend.
Sorry about all this bullshit. I do cop phrases of yours once in a while, but I always attribute them if asked
I hope this doesn’t push you toward taking down the archives, I read back through them a lot when I need a good laugh. The spider punching incident makes me giggle every time I think about it.
Dusty – I just love your since of justice and glad that you aren’t a passive aggressive idiot like me and opted for the fake publisher ruse. Folks need a leader to call a douche a douche and take action.
You are a good American.
I’m always late to the party. Is this guy on Facebook or Myspace? I plagiarized my way through school but this seems completely different. I never wanted to be the author, just wanted to pass the class.
I’d love the name and address of this mook. Anyone, anyone?
Oh look Captain Kirk, you got a package -what’s in it? Is that a piece of shit? Nope…..it’s a perforated bag of diarrhea. hmhmm
I just wanted to let you know mycoxisfloppin.